Childhood

brown wooden armchair on brown wooden floor
Photo by Marcelo Jaboo on Pexels.com

 

CHILDHOOD

Chair in the corner of the dining room,

and Daddy sitting in it, and only the orange glow from the ashes,

and gray puffs of smoke,

gave any signal of human presence.

Otherwise it was just the darkness and a chair in the corner,

otherwise it was just daddy in the dark and all alone.

I watched the firelight from the cigarette, as a child,

and wondered why the night was so black,

and why Daddy was so alone, and why voices rang out in the night.

I thought of Mama in the next room sleeping,

and I wondered why I was so small, and why Mama and Daddy never laughed.

And I felt like the night, cold,

and like Daddy,

and like Mama.

so all alone.

Copyright 2019, Jenny W. Andrews

 

My poetry book “Life at the End of the Rainbow” is currently available at Amazon/Kindle. I would love to hear any feedback about my poetry. Thanks.

-Jenny

 

My Favorite Quote: Hope and Potential

Consult not your fears but your hopes and dreams. Think not about your frustrations, but about your unfulfilled potential. Concern yourself not with what you tried and failed in, but with what it is still possible for you to do.

Words from Pope John XXIII

These are the words that I encourage you to remember in your heart as you go about your day. Life can be frustrating; but, there is so much potential in each of us.

Remember the words of Pope John XXIII.

Jenny W. Andrews copyright 2021

A Fast Retreat: Poem from the Past

I am,

within my shell.

Don’t speak to me; I don’t want to connect to you or anyone.

I will never reach out, again.

Your sting was too tainted with poison for me to ever be my loving, trusting self again.

Within my own mind,

I beat a fast retreat, not wanting to ever feel again.

I want to clam up.

I don’t want to feel anything.

I don’t.

I,

want to stand alone.

Be here where I am.

Shut the door on the world, and throw away the key.

Jenny W. Andrews copyright 2021

The Present

Pictured here is a torii gate that the local arboretum has in its Japanese garden near the tea house. The arboretum is very peaceful with its winding paths, rocks, flowers, trees and shrubs. Traditionally, the torii gate is at the entrance of a sacred space.

This sprawling garden fits my definition of a sacred space.

It is a refuge. It is a place I can go and quietly sit beside the pond and watch the branches of the willow tree sweep into the water and watch the koi fish swim between the willow trees’ delicate, sweeping branches.

The pale blue sky above me and the chilly January breezes remind me of the simple beauty of this life. This life is such a priceless jewel and God has blessed each of us with this day to just bask in the sunlight and to breathe in the sacredness of this moment.

For the next couple of weeks, I am unplugging social media. I do not want to know about those things that trouble me. Yes, I am going to stick my head in the sand and look away.

Only God can change this trajectory of chaos and mayhem.

I can choose to take a deep breath, stay in the moment, go for a peaceful stroll among the ancient oak, pause beneath the red torii gate and consider the sacredness of this space in time.

God has blessed us with so much that we as a society have taken for granted.

I am thankful to God for the beauty of this day.

I am thankful and I give praise to my God for this gift of sacredness.

Jenny W. Andrews copyright 2021

Psalm 91 for Protection

Everywhere we turn there is the proliferation of fear, chaos and mayhem.

Truth is, God is in control. He loves His children and protects His children.

I am His child and I turn completely to Him for my protection, peace and safety.

Psalm 91: 1 states: He that dwellest in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty. (2) I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in him will I trust. (3) Surely he shall deliver thee from the snare of the fowler, and from the noisome pestilence. (4) He shall cover thee with his feathers, and under his wings shalt thou trust: his truth shall be thy shield and buckler. (5) thou shalt not be afraid for the terror by night; nor the arrow that flieth by day; (6) Nor for the pestilence that walketh in darkness; nor for the destruction that wasteth at noonday.

No matter what tomorrow or the day after brings, God will protect me.

He will protect you.

Trust in God completely for your peace.

Read His word.

Pray to Him for divine protection.

Please join me in this prayer:

Almighty Father God,

Please protect me, heal me, and surround me with your angels. I trust in you with all my heart, soul and mind. Please grant me peace. Please quiet my fearful heart. Remind me of your eternal promise to always protect your children. I am your child, and Father I beg your protection from evil. Surround me and surround those whom I love most with your angels.

Thank you for your protection.

In Christ Jesus’s Holy name I pray.

Amen

Jenny W. Andrews copyright 2021

Escaping to Paradise: A Dream

To say this year has gotten off to a very rocky start is an understatement of epic proportions.

As if 2020 wasn’t horrible enough, well. . . .it appears that this year isn’t heading in a very promising direction.

I am an optimist by nature and I firmly trust in my Lord Jesus Christ for protection. He tells us not to fear and to trust in Him. I absolutely trust in Him.

However, as of late I have been envisioning myself sailing away to a tropical island somewhere where there is absolutely no internet connection, where there is nothing except a beautiful sandy beach and glorious sunrise to greet me each morning and a glorious sunset to relax me in the evening.

God has given us ungrateful humans a fascinatingly beautiful world, yet we create ways to destroy it. We obsessively fixate on the glass being half empty rather than filled to the brim with overflowing joy, bountifulness and awe-inspiring beauty.

I don’t want to be a person who gives into the fear-mongering. I don’t want to be a person who surrenders to this joy depleting agenda that has taken hold of this world.

I want to escape to a more gentler place. I want to unplug. I want to spend my hours filled with joy and not spend my hours being afraid of illness, terror, and death.

To be honest, I truly want to escape this modern life that has become a fiasco of epic proportions.

I want to actually see peoples’ faces again so that I can see their smiles.

I miss seeing smiles.

I want to speak truthfully what is on my mind without fear of censorship.

I want to be the free soul that God created me to be.

In this current state of the world I do not believe that this is possible.

Yes, I want to escape and unplug.

I want to be Free. Free. Free.

The art work here is the ship in my imagination that I would use to just sail away.

It is my original artwork.

I could spend endless hours in my imagined paradise painting and writing.

An island paradise. . . .

This is what I would like to find. . . .

Just sail away into a beautiful sunset.

And into freedom.

Jenny W. Andrews copyright 2021